Do you work with someone who spends too much time and effort worrying about others? They share negative opinions like, “So and so came in late and no one wrote them up.” “I can’t believe SHE got a raise.” “How did they ever make HIM a manager?” They’re seldom happy for others, which makes them … unhappy people. This post is for them – share it with them. And if this describes you, you’ll be much happier when you learn to worry about yourself not others. 

Life is Too Short to Create Drama

Life will offer enough challenges outside of your control. Adding unnecessary problems, concerns, and worries NEVER makes life better. What’s important to you? Is being happy on your list? What if you could immediately make yourself a happier life? Here’s your answer: Stop worrying about others. I don’t mean your children, friends, and family; of course, you’ll always have hopes and concerns for them. I’m talking about when you think someone got more than you, got something they didn’t deserve, or got away with something. There’s a word for this. It’s jealousy. Someone got something and you didn’t and you think it’s just not fair.

That’s one way to look at it, but that way will only make you unhappy. Living your life in anger undermines your happiness. Be honest — have you ever felt good about worrying that someone got more than you? If your neighbor got a new car, your co-worker got a day off, or your friend’s husband bought her a new ring, how does that adversely affect you? It doesn’t. If you enjoy misery, then by all means, immerse yourself in this petty jealousy. If you decide being hateful isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, you might decide to be happy. Worry about yourself, not everyone else.

Overcoming Jealousy

Be happy for others

The minute jealousy raises its ugly head, say this to yourself: “I’m happy for them because________.” Try the following thought exercise. If it was you receiving good news, would it make you happy? How? There’s your answer. Find a reason to be happy for others.

Ask yourself what this has to do with you?

If it doesn’t directly affect you, if it has nothing to do with you then it’s not your concern. If someone at work, church, or your club receives added benefits, but it doesn’t change a thing you do — leave it alone. Tell yourself, “It doesn’t affect me and it’s none of my business.”

Do you want to be happy or mad?

It’s up to you. No one but you controls your happiness. Seriously, stop blaming others for your mood. Nobody causes you to feel or think in any particular way — only you can decide that. Ask yourself, “How do I feel, and how do I want to feel?” When you decide how you want to feel — own it.

Life is too Short and Imperfect to waste it with Worry

You will have challenges outside your control, and there will be disappointments and tragedies. You can add to this by creating drama, or you can eliminate the negatives in your life within your control. It’s up to you. Ask yourself, Do you want to be happy?

Do you know someone who allows petty jealousies to interfere with happiness? Do they disrupt others by creating drama? I had someone in mind when I wrote this post. I’m going to share it with them. I hope they’ll listen. I hope it helps. Do you know someone who needs to read this?

I couldn’t resist adding this — have you seen the toddler attempting to fasten her car seat telling her dad to worry about himself? If you haven’t, you should. Make today the best day possible.

Another way to embrace happiness is through gratitude. Here’s A Daily Workplace Gratitude Checklist

Photo by Tim Gouw on Unsplash